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Anybody who smokes has probably said at one point or the other, "Why did I ever start?"; or "If I had known it would be so hard to quit, I never would have started." There are no answers to that question and usually there are none when somebody asks a smoker why exactly he or she decided to pick up this vice that can seriously compromise their health. As hard as it is for a non-smoker to understand why somebody smokes, it is just as hard for him or her to understand when somebody can't just quit.

Quitting smoking can be the hardest thing a person has ever gone through. All the well-intended advice from family members or friends (who don't smoke or have quit for some time now) and warnings from the doctor don't help, if the person is not willing to quit.

For a person who has smoked for a long time, quitting is not about gaining something; possibly gaining a longer life, gaining health for you and people who live with you and having more money in your pocket. It's giving something up. Each person knows what that is; the reward you give yourself at the end of work or during breaks, the relaxing feeling when you're stressed out, the perfect accompaniment for coffee or alcoholic beverages, the aura of sexiness or rebellion, fear of gaining weight or the desert after a meal.

Faced with quitting, the person fears that his quality of life will change for the worse, that he will not be able to function without a cigarette or that he will not have the drive to get through the day without the promise of a smoke when he leaves the office.

You might see where I'm going with this. Before you go out and buy Nicorette or a nicotine patch, you have to change your way of thinking. I'll name some books on the topic. Some people will get the so-called "Aha experience", a breakthrough that will help him to find the willpower to quit, but for others it just might not work. Therefore, before you go spending money on books, maybe you should check if your library has them. - "The easy way to stop smoking" by Allen Carr - "Cure your cravings" by Yefim Shubentsov and Barbara Gordon - "Quit smoking without willpower" by Trevor Wheeler - "The smoke stops here" by Jim Lacey - "Quittin' time" by Jenny N. Duffey

There are many, many more books on the topic. Some people will get nothing out of them, even though the book promises to magically relieve you of your desire for nicotine. However, others will gradually work their way to a place where they find the will to quit smoking and stay away from it for the rest of their lives. A lot depends on the personality of the person and the reasons behind this decision. The first step is to find the will power and the honest desire to quit, be it for yourself or for your children. Many times, it takes a health scare to reach the point where the person decides to quit before it seriously affects his health. Sometimes, it's already too late.

Michael Russell Your Independent Stop Smoking guide.